Probability of getting someone "special"!!

ಕನ್ನಡ ರಾಜ್ಯೋತ್ಸವದ ಹಾರ್ದಿಕ ಶುಭಾಶಯಗಳು!!! ಬಾರಿಸು ಕನ್ನಡ ಡಿಂಡಿಮವ....

I seriously don't know why I'm writing like this, just a thought struck to me. So here I go.. Have you ever thought of someone special in your life? Yes I'm stressing on "someone special", so how do you get yourself a "special" someone??? Alright then, She (HE in case of a female reader, gosh I seriously doubt girls think in this convoluted way) need not be that special, just enough to make others flabbergasted, how 'you' of all people managed to get hitched. Don't get me wrong, you might be a great guy, with good looks, great sense of humor, all that jazz and stuff...but a 'girlfriend' ?? Seriously. Don't make me laugh, I've eaten way too much!!(p.s: I'm referring to that kind of girlfriend, not just a friend) If you are not really a girlfriend type (being so juvenile, vapid, a senseless clod with an EQ that matches a sledgehammer's..wait wait, before you pounce upon me, let me tell you, I belong to the same category as you are, and can spot a fellow idiot a mile away. Trust me!!) how do you land up with one? dumb luck? May be not, although it does help quite a bit. (Certainly more than the debonair charm you are so famous for...) Maybe you need the charm reminiscent of a 80's movie star! Definitely that's not going to happen, maybe you have to wait for another era, where cloning takes over the plastic surgery and you look like George Clooney or Di Caprio.

Great!!!.. Now we've eliminated two choices that a girl looks for, and you don't have. Then what can you do, to give up your bachelor status?? hmm.. sweet talk? communication between the two hearts? (maybe you need to have good antennas and receptors, with more transmission bandwidth and anti-noise generators to suppress the the unwanted signal.. err..sorry couldn't control) When people like you and I talk, well, lets just say, we dig our own relationship graves, six feet and a whole deal more.

Nice..now three down the drain. What can you possible do now?? Flirt? I bet, by the end we'll be flirting with 'disaster'. Any similar attempts done with the opposite sex results in total, arrant and complete disaster. I guess, you would have better chance walking across a mine field, blindfolded.

OK now we are ourselves free from ostentatious Looks, Luck, Talking and Flirting. Anything left? what is it? Aha..!! its Emotional Quotient Intelligence.. So what if you are akin to that of a sledgehammer's? So what if you are a Genius? What are you going to do? Ask her out with a Calculus book (preferably Thomas and Finny) in one hand and a thesis on Digital signal processing on the other? You'll be very lucky to escape with minor injuries. Its better to shoot on your leg, guaranteed to be less painful.

Finally we are at the end of the murderously painful insight into your love related attributes. Congratulations...you are a new Enigma. Is that your runic attitude that has impressed others? How did you get a girlfriend??? Seriously........

P.S: I don't know why this Idea struck to me, and is not directed at anyone in particular. Look at the category below...