Have you ever been the victim of profanity?? Well, I never use fucking profanity. Not even in my fucking narration, stories, blogs, and not even in my fucking everyday life. There are some noble souls out there, who take extreme pride in using it, and they use it fucking extensively. The resplendent word 'FUCK' appears in every sentence they use. There was a time when 'SHIT' was very popular, but now its been replaced by 'FUCK'. I wonder which word will replace this in future(my imagination already running wild). Well, there was a time once we used to raise our fucking eyebrows when somebody used to use this word, but now we raise our eyebrows if one doesn't use it. Isn't it a fucking irony?? Ah!My own personal experiences with so many fucking uncultured and uncivilized people who use this beautiful word all the time really inspired me to find out more about it. So I started digging wiki, webster, etc. and eventually I found out some fucking etymological facts. I'm posting 3 different stories, and which one is true, you've to find it out for yourself!
1. In ancient England a person could not have sex unless he had the consent of the King (or unless he was in the Royal Family). When people wanted to have a baby, they first had to get the consent of the King; the King then gave them a placard that they hung on their door while having sex. The placard had F.U.C.K. (Fornication Under the Consent of the King) written on it.
2. F.U.C.K. originated in the 1800s in London, when someone would be punished for prostitution. It was an acronym for the words, “For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge.” These words were written on the cells that held these criminals. Some time later the officers got sick and tired of writing these words, so they abbreviated to F.U.C.K. Later on they just started writing FUCK (without full stops).
The third one explains why we use an analogy 'Middle Finger' for 'FUCK'.
3. Before the Battle of Agincourt in 1415, the French, anticipating victory over the English, proposed to cut off the middle finger of all captured English soldiers. Without the middle finger, it would be impossible to draw the renowned English longbow; and therefore, they would be incapable of fighting in the future. This famous English longbow was made of the native English Yew tree, and the act of drawing the longbow was known as 'plucking the yew' (or 'pluck yew'). Much to the bewilderment of the French, the English won a major upset and began mocking the French by waving their middle fingers at the defeated French, saying, “See, we can still pluck yew!” Since 'pluck yew' is rather difficult to say, the difficult consonant cluster at the beginning has gradually changed to a labiodental’s fricative F', and thus the words often used in conjunction with the one finger salute. It is also because of the pheasant feathers on the arrows used with the longbow that the symbolic gesture is known as ‘giving the bird.’ As the centuries passed by ‘yew’ became ‘you’ since both are pronounced in the same way. So, fuck you!
These are the three stories behind the divine word 'FUCK'. I guess you must be bewildered now. Did your knowledge expand? Good for you! Congratu-fucking-lations!! Now 'FUCK' is no more an ordinary word, but a fascinating subject to be studied and researched.
While doing the research on the work 'FUCK', I happened to listen the speech orated by the Late Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh a.k.a Osho (1931-1990). I didn't want to listen to some fucking Bhagwan giving reviews about 'fuck'. But seeing the comments on that audio clip, I made a brave attempt to listen it. After listening to it, all I can say is, it was surely an eye opener. The audio clip was about 5min, I'm posting exact words said by Osho.
"It is one of the most beautiful words. English language should be proud of it. I don’t think any other language has any such beautiful word. One of the most interesting words in English language today is the word ‘Fuck.’ It is one magical word, just by its sound; it can describe pain, pleasure, hate and love. In language, it falls into many grammatical categories. It can be used as a verb, both transitive and intransitive.
Transitive: John fucked Mary.
Intransitive: Mary was fucked by John.
As a noun: Mary is a fine fuck.
As an adjective: Mary is fucking beautiful.
As you can see there are not many words with the versatility of ‘Fuck.’ Besides the actual meaning, there are also the following uses.
Fraud: I got fucked at the used car lots.
Ignorance: Fucked, if I know.
Trouble: I guess I am fucked now.
Aggression: Fuck you!
Displeasure: What the fuck is going on here?
Difficulty: I can’t understand this fucking job.
Incompetence: He is a fuck off.
Suspicion: What the fuck are you doing?
Enjoyment: I had a fucking time.
Request: Get the fuck out of here.
Hostility: I am going to knock your fucking head off.
Greeting: How the fuck are you?
Apathy: Who gives a fuck!
Innovation: Get a bigger fucking hammer.
Surprise: Fuck! You scared the shit out of me.
Anxiety: Today is really fucked.
This was it! He then goes on to say that repeating the mantra “Fuck you!” 5 times soon after getting up in the morning clears your throat. How fucking cool is that! I've uploaded this audio in mediafire. You can download it and listen. I suggest you to listen it once. Here's the link.
Some amazing people like Bruce Willis, Guy Ritchie, Eminem, 50 cent and many more have contributed to this subject and we the fucking disciples, should follow their fucking footsteps and never fucking let them down. They may not even know how to use the words ‘joie de vivre’ or ‘bon vivant,’ but they definitely know how to use the word ‘Fuck’ in every aspect of their dialects. In future, children will learn Eminem lyrics instead of Ba Ba Black Sheep or Humpty Dumpty. Maybe someday in future, teachers might say to their students, "Why the bloody fuck haven't you done your homework?" to which the reply might be "I was fucking out of station" or "Fuck! I was fucked by the ill".
My dear folks, don't you think its time for us to start introspecting. Do we really want to set these kinds of examples to our younger generation? Do we really want some 10 yr old kid to say to us, “Fuck you, oldie! Can’t you just mind your own fucking business?” So common all of you, lets swear on Oxford, Merriam-Webster, Collins that we shall never fucking use profanity!
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